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5.28.09 A New Series of Reflections Begins

The Mugwort Letters


June 30, 1975

My dear Absinthius,

I was gravely disappointed to read your last report. So your man has reconciled with his rival bishop Shaheen?

All these years we have distracted the Syrians with division in their Archdiocese, and now all our work has vanished? You are right to fear the penalties! You need only recall the fate of those Tempters once assigned to Hawaweeny to know what punishments await you if your man follows down his path.

But do not despair – you may yet win back your man from the Enemy - and with him thousands more. Remember our success with that bishop Ofiesh? And after him, remember how, in the middle thirties, those Syrians nearly united as one, but we sowed discord and kept them apart. We can again put stop to the Enemy’s advances in America, if only you follow my instructions.

Your man is a dynamic bishop; he is loved and respected. And what is worse, he loves back! He knows all his clergy by name. Indeed, they consider him one of themselves. All those fools are in such awful joy over the recent union. (And you say he brought all of the Toledo priests to his home for a celebration? Ah!) The Enemy may indeed rejoicing now, but we will yet win the day.

Remember how Our Father Below won for himself the first man in the garden? Through pride. Pride, Absinthius. Pride is the weakness of those in authority. Your man is celebrated; he is beloved by all. Already synchophants are starting to surround him. Do you not see where to attack? Suggest to him that he is not just a truly great man, but that he can do no wrong. Tell him that he alone knows the right path, and that anyone who disagrees with him is not just his enemy, but, even more, the enemy of his whole pathetic Archdiocese.

Absinthius, turn your man into a despot. Make him love the adulation, and he will soon crave it. Lead him to believe all the flatteries of the masses. And when he has embraced pride, we will then use it to undo the Enemy’s works. Only, dear Absinthius, you must have patience.

Your affectionate uncle,



November 15, 1986

My dear Absinthius,

What a panic you are in – “ Evangelicals have begun to join the Archdiocese, and I will be forever damned for it!” Really, Absinthius, calm yourself. Why do you act so surprised that Gillquist and his cronies are joining your man’s Archdiocese? They were bound to enter the Enemy’s Church, if not with your man, then with Iakovos or Theodosius. You are wrong to panic. Their Tempters – not you – will be punished for this conversion.

In fact, this recent development accords you a great opportunity. First and foremost, it is yet another chance to bolster your man’s pride. He will once again be the hero, acclaimed by all as an evangelist and visionary. He will be lauded as never before, especially by those who are now entering the Archdiocese. They will honour him; they will write books about him; they will practically canonize him during his lifetime. And the more glory he receives, the more intoxicated he will become....

Furthermore, your man will be in even a better position to harm far more of the Enemy’s followers. You are right when you predict that even more converts will join the Archdiocese, but you fail to see the irony in this: they will be under the authority of your man, a man whom we are making ever more vulnerable. His every failing will be a cause for their stumbling. All you must do is ensure that he fails, and we will turn the Enemy’s victory into our own.

Here is how you must begin. Suggest to your man that the Evangelicals should join the Archdiocese quickly, far more quickly than anyone will expect. Try to have it done by Spring, if not sooner – February would be ideal. There will be no time for the converts to be fully instructed in the Enemy’s teachings; just tell your man that they know enough already. There is no need for further preparation or changes. I will direct the Northern California Legion to redouble their efforts on Hardenbrook and his fellows, and we will lay the groundwork for a crisis there.

In short order, your man will be more full of himself than he ever has been, and more susceptible to your control than you ever could have imagined. You will then be in a position to disrupt those bumbling efforts for “unity” among the Enemy’s American followers.

Always remember that fundamental principle of ours, which the Enemy exposed in his vile Book:
“Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.”

Your affectionate uncle,




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